Mental Health Monday: What Is Trauma Bonding?

What is trauma bonding?

This language below comes from Google’s AI Overview:

Trauma bonding refers to a strong emotional attachment that develops between a victim and their abuser, often characterized by a cycle of abuse interspersed with moments of kindness, leading to a sense of loyalty and dependence on the abuser despite the harmful nature of the relationship.

Key points about trauma bonding:

• Cycle of abuse:The abuser utilizes a pattern of alternating abusive behavior with brief periods of positive treatment, creating a confusing and addictive dynamic for the victim. 
• Fear and manipulation:The victim may feel fear, intimidation, and manipulation from the abuser, contributing to the bond. 
• Isolation:Abusers often isolate their victims from friends and family, further strengthening the dependence on them. 
• False hope:The victim may cling to the hope that the abuser will change and return to the positive moments, preventing them from leaving the relationship. 

Where trauma bonding can occur:

Romantic relationships: This is the most commonly discussed scenario, where a partner is abusive towards the other. 

Family dynamics: Children can experience trauma bonding with abusive parents. 

Cult situations: Individuals within a controlling cult may develop a trauma bond with the leader. 
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Trauma bonding is a hallmark impact of narcissistic abuse. If you or loved ones are experiencing these kinds of dynamics, there are forms of help and healing. And those harmed are worth all the love and care they can receive.

Here’s a great video from Christina, a coach at @commonego on YouTube. She demonstrates how trauma bonding functions like an addiction, and how such a bond tends to form over time.