I sat facing the congregation, wearing a stole, listening to the organ prelude. Worship was about to begin.
As I approach my seventh year working in public health within a nonprofit, I can honestly say I love the path I’m on. It’s exactly where I want to be. Though it’s been a long time since I served as a pastor, I still lead pulpit supply frequently, filling in for colleagues when they’re away. I’ve also led several church retreats over the past year. While this is no longer where I spend most of my time, it remains an integral part of my upbringing and my sense of belonging.
As I listened to the organ prelude, my mind wandered to some of the most formative people in my life. They’ve been on my mind as I chart a new course, one added to the others. Though I’ve been writing daily for many years, I’m now working on my first book. I recently finished a chapter reflecting on my upbringing in a Presbyterian church.
Here’s a paragraph from that chapter:
I was raised by a Christian congregation, and that community became a chosen family and home in my life. When I share this, I don’t simply mean that I grew up attending worship services. For me, this was far more than a weekly routine. I was raised intentionally by St. John United Presbyterian Church in New Albany, Indiana. In that congregation, a whole circle of people decided to love me and treat me as if I were their very own daughter. It transformed the direction of my life.
As worship began yesterday, I thought about how there’s no way I’d be sitting here, about to lead this service, if it weren’t for those people. This role I’m in emerged simply and powerfully because I received so much love there.
I was thinking about how plants grow toward the sun. We can see them stretch in that direction. Could it be that we, too, grow in the places where love is shown to us?
Had I been surrounded by a different group of people, might I have developed roles I couldn’t have anticipated? And isn’t that why I also work in public health and nonprofit now? Because love found me there, too?
I enjoyed reflecting on these questions yesterday morning.
So, where is love showing up for you? And how are you growing and stretching toward it?
— Renee Roederer
Smuggling Grace 