“Let your yes be yes and your no be no.” [1]
This is good advice spoken by Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount. In its original context, there is wisdom about avoiding oaths we don’t truly intend to keep — promises that overreach what we will actually do.
This is also good wisdom for the days we are living now.
Let your yes be yes, and let your no be no. And perhaps we can add this: let your no-s affirm and empower your best yes-es.
There are times when we have to say no to things that would genuinely be valuable to do. Not because they don’t matter, but because saying yes to them would mean we no longer have the energy, commitment, or capacity to say yes to the things we can do uniquely.
In the era we’re living in, we can’t do it all.
We can stay informed.
We can support people who are involved in areas where we are not able to be as active.
We can send our money in those directions.
We can offer encouragement.
And when we are asked for help, we can respond meaningfully and with care and action.
But there will also be things we simply cannot engage as deeply in because we need to carve out necessary space for the work, the roles, and the commitments we are best positioned to hold. That positioning comes from our talents, our skills, and the communities to whom we are connected.
I am deeply grateful for people who are working in areas where I am not able to be as active. I can support them. Likewise, there are needs and communities to which I can be especially present. I need the support of others as I do that.
So let your yes be yes.
Let your no be no.
And let your no-s affirm and empower your best yes-es.
—Renee Roederer
[1] Matthew 5:37
Smuggling Grace 