Yesterday afternoon, about 60 people gathered in a graveyard, and together, they encircled the casket of their loved one. The experience was at times playful and at other times poignant. I had met this loved one a few times, and in fact, I had just seen her three weeks ago.
But I am very close to her daughter, and I was there to support her as she offered a eulogy for her Mother.
“She’s a work of art,” I thought as I listened to my friend speak. It takes such strength to write something so meaningful and to speak it aloud while surrounded by that circle. In such moments, everything means; nothing is insignificant. Everything carries meaning, and everything expresses meaning. I was impressed not only by her ability to speak her own truth and memories but also by the way she made sacred space for others to do the same, all while feeling the emotions of the present moment.
A beautiful life,
A complicated life,
We are all so beautiful and complicated.
As we stood around this circle, my friend said, “I was struck by something one of my Mom’s friends said recently. The people around my Mom’s life are a web, and what affects one affects everyone.”
Someone else then offered to sing and repeated the words, “We are woven together,” as part of a chorus.
I thought, does anything matter more than that web? The people who surround our life, and the people whose lives we surround?
Though I love it, I’ve been too focused on the details of work lately. I’m not talking about the community within that work. I mean I’ve been way too focused on to-do lists. I’ve been rushing. I’ve been stressed. My muscles are often tense.
If the work isn’t connected to that web, it’s just a stress-inducing list. But when that web is formed across all our spheres of life — family (born and chosen), friends, daily rhythms, and yes, work — then it is worth our energy.
It’s better to do our living and loving with that vision in mind.
—Renee Roederer
Smuggling Grace 