Smuggling Grace

Bees bumble from flower to flower, using the navigation of bright colors to bring them to life-giving nectar. They collect it and covert it to honey to care for their young, and by extension, the whole hive.

But they have no idea they are pollinating the world’s food supply.

It helps me to remember that. The lives of bees are already so intricate and complex even in what they do intend, but beyond that, their work yields more life and complexity than they know.

Maybe this can remind us:

Individually, and especially collectively, our best intentions, our best connections, our best work, our best loves, and our best visions may yield more life and complexity than we know too.

– Renee Roederer

At the beginning of the month, I reached the two-week period after my second vaccination, and after a very long wait, I jumped back in to do certain things I haven’t done in more than a year. In fact, I just returned to Michigan after visiting loved ones out of state, and that trip felt glorious.

I loved so many aspects of that time, but perhaps I was most grateful for the occasion to have shared meals with people I’ve missed for a very long time. Now that I’m back home, I’m going to continue making an intentional effort to keep that going. There is something so special in sharing meals with people you love. It is at once, simple and sacred. I’m grateful for the connections, community, and kinship.

I never want to take this for granted again. And I’m all in for more!

–Renee Roederer

I’d love to hear your thoughts.

I feel a bit ambivalent about the new CDC guidelines — that fully vaccinated people can go without masks in indoor spaces, including highly populated ones. On one hand, that feels exciting. On the other hand, it becomes very difficult to make community decisions. It remains important to protect the health of one another.

Celebrations:

— To begin, it makes me excited to get to this point. The science is showing us that fully vaccinated people are unlikely to contract COVID, and especially not with dangerous outcomes, and the science is showing is that fully vaccinated people are unlikely to spread it to others (we didn’t know at whether this would be true at first. I’m glad the data is showing this).

I also hope this will incentivize vaccination for those who can receive it.

Concerns:

— These new guidelines are based on the data about fully vaccinated people. The CDC guidelines say that unvaccinated people still need to protect themselves with masking and social distancing. I’m nervous that we seem to be going on an honor system here. We know that a lot of unvaccinated people are going to go mask-less, something that’s not only dangerous to them but others who have health conditions that make them vulnerable. This is additionally true for children who cannot yet be vaccinated.

I’m also concerned that this passes on the decision making for masking guidelines and in-person gatherings to communities and businesses rather than federal stakeholders. Do leaders of houses of worship want to be pressured to make decisions that could turn their congregations into super-spreaders? Do community event holders want that responsibility? Restaurant managers? Grocery store managers?

Some places may still have high COVID transmission numbers and low vaccination rates. This isn’t uniform. It would be very helpful to have some advice concerning benchmarks to make these decisions.

What are your thoughts?

–Renee Roederer

To the Person That Harms,
To the Family That Wounds,
To the Shame That Devours,
To the Violence That Festers,

To the Grief That Upends,
To the Diagnosis that Stuns,
To the Substance That Hooks,
To the System That Discriminates,

You,

Yes,
You,

Any of You, or
All of You, or
More Than You
(That Which Stays Silent or
That Which Exists Beyond Lists)

You.

You
have never been a gift in disguise —
not tied with a bow
or packaged with grand, silver linings.

But here’s one thing you’ve yet to figure out:

The more you knock us off balance —
The more you pummel,
The more you trounce,
The more you disrupt and delight in the off-kilter,

The more we come to know what our balance is.

And that balance,
when we know it,
when we can name it,
when we can internalize it,
is Strength Beyond Strength.

That Balance is Our Sacred Invitation.
That Balance is Our Secret Intervention.

–Renee Roederer

Speak words into the air.
Launch them into being.
Create entire worlds of meaning
from
sound,
voice,
intention.

Expand the universe of thought and possibility,
Propel it forward with sacred truth.
From your mind and heart, begin to introduce
your being,
your worth,
your value.

I AM,
I AM,
I AM.

We are the Word’s cultivation,
formed,
shaped,
nurtured.

We are the world’s culmination,
unearthed,
revealed,
valued.

So
Speak words of form,
We are born!
Sound words of grace,
We are free!
Shout words of love,
We are known!

And from
your very breath,
your very being,
let air become sound,
let sound become word,
let word become truth, for
you are transforming,
you are becoming,
YOU ARE.
You.
Are.

–Renee Roederer

This poem was inspired by a beautiful and powerful video of a father sharing morning affirmations with his three year old child. Click here to watch the video.

Sometimes, I marvel at who is in my life.
Sometimes, I am stunned to ponder that I could begin alone
then
become
connected
to
who after
who after
who after
who.

And this never ends.

It’s like a Big Bang, really.
A Whole Universe of Belonging.

We each start as a singularity.
Then
each one of us
bursts forth,
brought into an abundance of connections,
born anew bit by bit
through the particularities of relationship.

And these particularities
create
build
form
nurture
cultivate
and
renew.

They expand.

This is an ever expanding Universe —
this Cosmos
of
who after
who after
who after
who.

– Renee Roederer

[1]

I am afraid of a harmless thing.
It looks like it could creep,
or bounce,
or pounce,
or charge awkwardly with its considerable appendages.

But it does none of these.
It stays in place all day long,
content to rest in a single crevice,
or reside in clumps of countless others.

It wishes me no harm;
likewise, I wish it no hurt.
Unlike curious schoolchildren at recess,
I will not examine it,
or smash it,
or dash it,
or remove any of its legs.

But –
I will stand irrationally in fear.
I will freeze in the presence of a childhood phobia.
No matter the logic:
“It can’t bite you,”
“It can’t poison you,”
“It can’t jump on you,”
I will cringe with revulsion and anxiety.
I am afraid of a harmless thing.

It makes me wonder. . .

When
the word can’t enters our thinking, or
the word won’t enters our hoping, or
the word don’t enters our dreaming,
perhaps we fear something harmless too?

–Renee Roederer

[1] Photo Credit: Mehran Moghtadai/Arad/Wikipedia

Grace. It is with us and among us.
Grace. It is love, gift, worth, and favor for us.
Grace. It is above us, behind us, and around us.
Grace. It is right here alongside us.

Grace. It precedes us.
Grace. It surpasses us.
Grace. It is apart from us,
God’s Good Gift.

Yet remarkably,
This Grace —
This with,
This among,
This above,
This behind,
This around,
This Grace,
This Very Grace!
God’s Good Gift,
It passes through us.

Day by day,
Minute by sacred minute,
We breathe it,
We carry it,
We shoulder it.
We smuggle it.

God, breathing life into the world,
breathes through us.
So with joy
let’s smuggle grace this very instant —
into ourselves,
into each other,
into this God-breathed world. . .

–Renee Roederer

Suddenly, I heard my own prayer.
As I was making my final rounds before sleep —
turning off lights, putting dishes in the sink —
I suddenly heard myself,
my deeper self,
reverberate words from a prayer nine years ago.

There it was,
from a moment I had actually forgotten:
The words rose up and found themselves inside me
like a thought I didn’t think.

It was a mantra I prayed during a Taize service
in a time of transition —
a time
for which I was not ready, yet
for which I was being prepared.

Two phrases of prayer, uplifted over and over,
anxiety lending itself toward trust,
wondering if change can change us
even if we would like to change its pathway.

Times like this can shape becoming,
our own shaping,
our own becoming.
Times like this can shape our meaning-making,
as we carry mantles we do not know to choose,
yet for which we are lovingly chosen.

Despite what we hope for,
Despite what we wish for,
even our Deepest Despite
can lend its way toward a world of meaning and becoming.

So I suppose if a prayer can return again,
we can return
to this truth,
to this wondering,
to this becoming.

–Renee Roederer

If you close your eyes and awaken your awareness,

If you inhale deeply and let that breath fill every part of your being,

If you allow yourself to sit with the Question —
really and truly, as if you were taking it out for tea,
it will inhabit you,
it will enliven you,
it will call you by name,
and you will know what I’m talking about.

You will be familiar with the Question,
because it keeps making itself familiar to you.

It is that Question that keeps rising again
inside your being,
like an enormous, beckoning moon,
and the mysterious tide She consistently summons.

Yes, listen.
Stand on the shore of the horizon
and welcome the Question revealed in the waves
of
longing
lingering
dreaming.

. . . that Idea that keeps returning,
. . . that Love that keeps emerging,
. . . that Path that keeps arriving,

Listen. . .
In the swell of waves,
Ah, there it is –
Won’t you?

It sounds for you –
Won’t you?

Hear it resound and expand –
Won’t you choose that which is choosing you?

–Renee Roederer