I’d like to share a helpful TikTok today.
In it, a therapist talks about the Window of Tolerance. When we face trauma and high stress in our own lives and collective trauma in our public lives, the window by which we can regulate our nervous systems grows smaller. This is why we see people (and perhaps ourselves) reacting more to stress with fight, flight (hyperarousal) and freeze (hypoarousal) responses.
I’m embedding the TikTok below and also linking to it here.
10th Anniversary
Today is the 10th Anniversary of my ordination.
On March 25, 2012, I gathered with so many loved ones at University Presbyterian Church in Austin, Texas, and I felt so upheld and cared for as they ordained me as minister. It was one of the best days and moments of my whole life.
I have loved, and lived, and lamented, and learned, and been lifted so much in those ten years. Thanks to everyone who has supported me in this. I am grateful.
–Renee Roederer
Anxiety Is a Contagion
Many years ago, I worked in a context where everyone worked with their office doors closed. There may be many reasons for this — needing quiet, having a place to focus, or other kinds of needs entirely. That context was filled with lovely, supportive people, but this happened to be a very stressful period of time in our collective history. Some part of me wonders if we all kept our doors closed because stress pheromones were constantly floating through the air in that space.
Anxiety can function like a contagion. We can pick up on the anxious energy of others through body language and yes, even pheromones. We may also be anxious about similar concerns, and someone’s anxiety may evoke our own. That same anxiety in a person or community may also trigger older, stressful storylines from our lives. The anxiety can grow.
Sometimes, we need space alone or in small groups of non-anxious (at the moment) people so we can ground ourselves again and regulate or co-regulate our nervous systems.
In a remarkably anxious period of time, it is okay and helpful to take that space, both for ourselves and for the collective circles of people we love.
–Renee Roederer
Purple Day — Would You Watch This on Saturday?
Saturday, March 26 is Purple Day, a worldwide date in which people wear purple and educate others on Epilepsy Awareness. It is also going to be the public premiere of the award-winning film, “Under the Lights.” Miles Levin, its creator, wants to make this short film into a longer, full-feature film — and I agree! — so one way you can help is to watch it on its March 26 release. I’ve seen it, and it’s phenomenal. I don’t remember the exact length, but it’s 10-15 minutes long. Can you join us to watch it? — Any time on Saturday?
The Epilepsy Foundation of Michigan is promoting it on Facebook and Instagram.
“Prom season is here! Who wants to go?
Miles Levin has beautifully crafted an award-winning film, “Under the Lights” – A story about Sam, a boy with epilepsy who goes to prom knowing that the lights will make him have a seizure. The film features an all-star cast, including Pearce Joza (Disney and Nickelodeon), Alyssa Jirrels (Disney and Marvel), and Greg Grunberg (Star Wars and Star Trek).
Here is how you can be involved:
RSVP to join and watch its public premiere on March 26https://loom.ly/fx8PHmU
Share this post. Spread the word about the film. Invite your friends and family to do the same. https://loom.ly/vuevO5s
#breakthestigma#epilepsy#epilepsyfoundationofmichigan#underthelightsfilm#prom#classof2022“
Full Circle
I have a very vivid memory of sitting on a stoop alongside the Green Street sidewalk in Pasadena, California. I had earbuds in and was listening to music. A particular Elton John song came on shuffle, and I found myself thinking about Michigan. I was in transition and about to move there soon. As that song played, I found myself thinking about how I was going to meet students at the University of Michigan who would be significant in my life. At this point, they were nameless, but I knew they would mean a great deal to me.
Nine years later, I took the bus to meet some University of Michigan alumni who have become significant in my life. On a much warmer, first day of spring, we planned to take a walk together. I arrived a little bit early and sat on the steps near their apartment. I had earbuds in and was listening to music. That particular Elton John song came on shuffle, and I sat there, pondering how it was all true.
–Renee Roederer
Earth
I love to give recommendations from shows I’m watching on streaming services, and today, I’d like to give my best recommendation as of late. I’ve been watching National Geographic’s “One Strange Rock,” which can be found on Disney+. Some full episodes are also on YouTube.
This nature docuseries, narrated by Will Smith, tells about earth’s history and its unique characteristics for life from the perspective of astronauts who have observed Earth from space. It’s a series that evokes a sense of wonder, and it’s also so visually appealing.
Here’s the trailer:
“Are You Receiving This?”
I’ve been talking a lot lately about the need to receive.
In the era in which we’re living, it’s easy to either 1) overextend ourselves or 2) become too isolated. It’s important to receive from our relationships, nature, intentional rhythms, delightful surprises, and all the various gifts are around us. I’m writing about this because I need to remind myself about this.
Yesterday, I was with a loved one who knows I’ve been thinking intentionally about this, and she said, “Are you receiving this?”
There it was — a simple question to check-in and remind me to do that, and that was such a gift from her. So from time to time, I might ask myself that question now. If you’re like me, of if you find yourself in one of those categories — overextended or isolated — maybe you can ask yourself that question too.
“Are you receiving this?”
–Renee Roederer
Intake
I sing in a large choir. When we’re warming up our voices, if we sound a bit out of sync, our choir director will say, “Listen more than you sing.” We’re invited to pay attention to our neighbors and the collective whole which will inform how we are singing and adding to that whole.
I think that is a good metaphor for many things.
Receive intentionally so you have enough energy to give.
Learn what is needed so you can add yourself in a focused way.
Be present with the collective so you are in touch with yourself.
–Renee Roederer
Caring is Sharing
Yesterday evening, I sent a group message to some of my closest friends and named honestly how exhausted I am. Things are fine in my world, but over the last few weeks, I’ve had a lot of demands on my time and energy. Some have involved projects I love, but mostly, I have a sense that so many people are struggling all at the same time. My heart feels for many loved ones and for our collective world of loved ones who are anxious, sad, on edge, or unsure of life’s direction — and these, on top of any of the daily stressors we face.
I’ve just really been feeling it.
It felt good to name this and share my need to rest and rejuvenate. I am writing this the evening before this post will be scheduled for publication. I will not be setting an alarm for the morning.
I’m glad that others are holding me as I’m holding these needs.
Sharing is caring, but also caring is sharing.
–Renee Roederer
That Singular, Great Day
Every year, we have that singular, great day in Michigan when we reach the 60s for the first time after a long winter.
And every year, like bears coming out of hibernation, we all go outside. I especially love to walk through the center of the University of Michigan campus where you can find students enjoying hammocks they’ve set up between the trees, with others sitting on the grass in all directions.
It’s wonderfully predictable and wonderfully glorious.
–Renee Roederer
Smuggling Grace 